sly : marketing

The Story of the Cold Caller

A few hours ago, I picked up my phone, it was a fairly young person asking me if I was Jens. I said yes, even though I wanted to say no and just hang up. I knew what he was up to, and I only had five minutes before I had to go.

He was friendly, way too friendly. He asked me if I had kids, and again, I felt like telling him the truth. Two young kids, a 2 year old boy and a 5 year old daughter.

Oh good, he sounded relieved.

He asked if they enjoy to watch movies on dvd, I said yes.

Now, it was obvious what he was going to ask next. He was going to offer me a subscription for a monthly dvd aimed at my kids.

I thought, this is not going to happen, he had already spent 3 minutes trying to become my friend. And now, it was my turn. I wanted to have fun for the next two minutes. I wasn’t going to become a subscriber anyway.

He asked me if my kids had watched Madagaskar, Finding Nemo and Barnyard. I told him that they had and that they watch a lot of movies, even though they are both in kindergarten.

Oh, but what about the Shrek triology he said?

They have watched all three of them. As I told you, they watch a lot of movies.

Wow, the only offer I have left is the Bee movie, have they watched that one?

I told him  that they watched it about a month ago, and that they really enjoyed it.

I could hear that he was becoming frustrated, he was running out of offers.

Finally, he asked me if I enjoy watching movies. I told him that I watch even more movies than my kids.

He tested me, and asked me if I had watched any of the Varg Veum movies (fairly new and famous Norwegian movies). I told him the only answer he’d expect at this time of the conversation; I have watched them all.

I could picture him smiling, and thinking that I was the hardest catch of the day.

Cold calling isn’t suppose to be easy. I want to have fun, and with cold callers, it’s easy to have a blast, at least for a few minutes.

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